Hop into your time machine and travel back to 1978 for this one. Picture yourself walking into the record store and picking up a copy of the first Van Halen album that your friend persistently bugged you to buy. 

You put the needle down on the album and for the next 35 minutes and 34 seconds, you are put through the equivalent of a rock and roll buzzsaw.

The rhythm section is sublime and the vocals and the harmonization are otherworldly, but there’s one thing that you just can’t pinpoint: who is this guitar wizard and how is he playing like this? 

In the opening track “Runnin’ With the Devil,” you are greeted with car horns mimicking a bomb being dropped. This segways into a thumping bass line that mimics a heartbeat before further goes into Eddie Van Halen’s crushing power chords and David Lee Roth’s powerful voice promising that he’ll live life “like there’s no tomorrow.” 

If you want to have a good laugh, listen to the isolated vocal track on “Runnin’ With the Devil” and enjoy all the ad-libs that Roth throws in between bass player Michael Anthony’s backing vocals. 

It’s as if you’re at a party with Roth and he’s a little bit too jazzed up to party, if you know what I’m saying. 

The next two tracks are formatted into one in many classic rock radio stations across the United States. “Eruption/You Really Got Me” is the quintessential track that made all collective listeners lose their minds — especially “Eruption.” 

“Eruption” is basically just Eddie Van Halen channeling his inner Mozart by bringing the guitar techniques of hammer-ons, pull-offs and two-hand tapping into a schizophrenic, frantic rampage. Every young, impressionable guitar player wanted to imitate the guitar mastery of “Eruption,” but few could replicate it. 

While the cover of The Kinks’ “You Really Got Me” is a solid cover tune, the next two songs on this album are easily the best songs on this album and cemented Van Halen’s position in the rock and roll hierarchy as a force to be reckoned with. 

“Ain’t Talkin’ bout Love” is the go to song of the David Lee Roth era of Van Halen. With its anthemic chorus, Eddie Van Halen’s signature riffage and swaggering backbeat, this song is all that Van Halen is about and helped set the foundation for the 1980s hair metal revolution. 

My bone to pick with ‘80s hair metal is not the ridiculous fashion choices or the corny and sexually explicit lyrics, but all the Eddie Van Halen impersonators it produced.

George Lynch of Dokken and Warren DeMartini of Ratt are tapping and writing songs and riffs similar to “Ain’t Talkin’ bout Love.” It’s pretty cool, but could they not do it every song? 

Eddie Van Halen initially considered this song to be a parody of punk music and didn’t even want to show it to his bandmates. I find this quite ironic since the genre that was sparked in the wake of this album is essentially a parody of all that rock and roll is about. 

Rant about ‘80s hair metal aside, the crown jewel of this album is the track “I’m the One.” 

The isolated guitar track on this song is enough to make it my favorite on the album, but Roth and Anthony’s harmonization on this song is otherworldly. This includes a sensational 1950s doo-wop style breakdown after the second chorus. 

Side two of this album opens up with “Jamie’s Cryin,” a song with a catchy riff and chorus that implements a rock and roll swagger with the pop sensibilities of a girl in emotional distress after a break-up, hence the title. 

The one-two punch on side two of “Atomic Punk” and “Feel Your Love Tonight” goes toe to toe with the combo on side one of “Ain’t Talkin’ bout Love” and “I’m the One.” 

Eddie Van Halen’s guitar on “Atomic Punk” almost sounds like a Blackhawk helicopter coming in for a landing, mirrored with Roth’s street sensible lyrics on growing up in the rough part of Los Angeles where he was raised. 

“Feel Your Love Tonight” is a track about having too good of a time while out on the town. The signature Eddie Van Halen riffage and rhythm playing and the vocal harmonization stand out on this track. 

“Little Dreamer” takes the crown as the most underrated song on this album. With a catchy riff, swaggering backbeat and some of David Lee Roth’s best lyrical work, this song tells the story of a girl who is expected to fail but makes a name for herself against the odds. 

The song represents the adversity of a young band being told they aren’t going to make it and not quit their day jobs, yet they persevere and fight back against the world to make it big. 

The track “Ice Cream Man” seems like a giant goof with the guys in Van Halen having fun recording a Chicago-based blues track written by John Brim. However, I think this is the best solo that Eddie Van Halen plays on this record. This track blows my mind every time I listen to it. 

The closing track on this album, “On Fire,” is easily forgettable, but it does showcase David Lee Roth’s high-pitched screaming. It’s like he’s trying to channel his inner Ian Gillan from Deep Purple and some rather tasteful scratch-picking from Eddie Van Halen.

If your head hasn’t spontaneously combusted listening to this album, I don’t know what’s wrong with you.

This past weekend, I spoke with some of my relatives who were coming of age when this album was released. They were absolutely floored when this album came out and it was all they played at house parties when their parents were out of town. 

This album has stood the test of time as every time that I listen to it. I say to myself, “It sounds like this came out yesterday.”

This album has since been certified Diamond status by the Recording Industry Association of America and is one of those albums that is etched into the American landscape as a game changer. 

The album even reappeared on the Billboard 200 back in 2020 shortly after Eddie Van Halen passed from cancer that October.

So do me a favor when you get out of class today — listen to this album on whatever streaming service you have, crank the volume to the max and be prepared to have your mind blown. 

Mikalofsky can be reached at [email protected].