Sex. That word, though little, seems to linger on the tongue and hang in the mind. The media scream sex, and life seems to revolve around it and all that’s hot, gorgeous, flawless, and pleasurable.
Many people have told me they don’t care if they have sex with their partner before they’re married. After all, if you love someone, wouldn’t it be OK? The implications of sex outside of marriage often aren’t considered. The risk isn’t just pregnancy; it’s much more.
Sex outside of marriage is done in an uncommitted relationship, which means a person’s partner could be gone the next day if they so desired. Time after time, I’ve seen great heartbreak when someone gives in to the peer pressure of sex and they end up losing their partner. Suddenly, a person is left thinking the only reason their partner was with them was because of their body.
Is that special? Not if you ask me.
Sex is supposed to be a beautiful, special, intimate act between married couples. Your spouse won’t run away because of the fear of pregnancy or because they got what they wanted.
That person should be by your side for life, no matter what; for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health…that’s marriage, that’s solid, that’s commitment. Sound different than a one night stand that leaves you feeling terrified of what will happen tomorrow?
Oxytocin is a special bonding chemical present in sexual acts. However, a small amount of it is released in little pleasures such as holding hands, rubbing noses, or a simple hug. When two people have sex, large amounts of oxytocin are released, fusing the two together so they are literally one flesh.
Fluid from a man to a woman creates a new timing for the woman’s body so it matches that of the man. Imagine how broken and confused a body would be if it had sex with several different people!
I was listening to a radio program the other day about a woman who had been dating a man for five years. The two believed in purity, so nothing close to sex ever occurred. After awhile, they realized their lives were going in different directions, so they broke up.
A few months later, the woman found someone new. Within a short time, they had gone too fast. They never had sex, but they almost did. Soon they also broke up, and I remember hearing the woman say she couldn’t believe what happened. Here she had dated a man for years, and although she missed him terribly, the pain she felt was nothing compared to the grief she felt in her short relationship.
I recall her saying she craved the man with whom she had almost had sex. Did you catch that? She craved him. She woke up with every fiber in her body longing for that man, and they hadn’t even had sex. If that doesn’t say something, I don’t know what does.
Save yourself for marriage. Sex can wait. In marriage, it’s going to be sweeter than it ever could have been elsewhere. Set boundaries in your dating relationships so you don’t fall into a trap, because once the wrong path is taken, going back is difficult, and it takes discipline.
This doesn’t mean passion isn’t OK, but be aware. If you want a chance to have the best marriage of your life, save your body and soul for the love of your life.
