There is one thing I despise about fall: Homecoming.

Don’t get me wrong, autumn is a beautiful season. Trees take on their own personalities, showing off vibrant shades of orange, brown and red. The weather permits wearing sweaters over dress shirts and almost every store or business has a pumpkin spice flavored something.

Plus, it’s socially acceptable to stuff your face during Thanksgiving. It’s truly an amazing time to be alive.

I don’t hate the people who run for king and queen or the football team, I just hate the concept of it all.

My first complaint is about the direction my enthusiasm is supposed to be pointed. Am I supposed to be more excited about the football game or the ridiculous number of campaign posters lining the campus mall?

At least high school homecoming was centered around the football game. Here at UW-Eau Claire it’s like the game wasn’t even mentioned at all.

My second complaint is about the barrage of random stuff thrown in my face on the way to class by people running for king and queen. I’m sorry, but I don’t vote based on how many material objects you can bribe me with.

You exponentially decrease your chance of getting my nomination when I can’t enjoy my music because “Vote for…” is being yelled at my face.

The biggest thing I was confused about this year was the term “royalty.” I know it was used as a gender neutral term for everyone. But why?

It’s good to make everyone feel comfortable on campus no matter who they are, but I don’t think it’s accommodating when you mandate everyone to have gender neutral terms.

Now before I go any further, please know I don’t feel malice toward any particular group of people, especially not those who would prefer not to be identified by a traditional gender title.

Just as transgender individuals should have the right to be identified in a way they prefer, so should people who align with traditional gender roles.

I, for instance, am male. I would like to be called a man (or boy, guy, whatever). If I was running for homecoming and I won, I would like to be called king, partly because it implies a sense of accomplishment and also because it’s what I feel comfortable with.

If this is the way the candidates running for this year’s homecoming office felt, then fine, but it bothered me how politically correct the campus was trying to be. If someone who was born female but wanted to be identified as a male was running, that’s awesome and he should be able to identify as such, including the shift in title if he in fact won.

To me, the terms “king” and “queen” hold no particular offense to someone of transgender status, so the change to “royalty” wasn’t necessary in my eyes. Honestly, those terms are more offensive to people living under the poverty line than they ever will be to a man who identifies as a woman.

I guess what I’m saying is I like things simple. I don’t enjoy when there are overarching themes and purposes behind changing the way people running for homecoming are referred to.

If John Doe was running for homecoming king and he wanted to be referred to as queen, then there should be nothing restricting that.

It could just be that I’m over analyzing a simple title, but I’ll leave that for you to decide.