Nickelodeon

There’s a spiritual bond formed when you make back-to-back Spongebob references with someone. If someone can finish your Squidward quote, that’s grounds for marrying them.

Nickelodeon has raised me to become the man I am today. I watched and explored the world with the “Rugrats” as a toddler, I related to the young boy struggles in “Rocket Power” and “Hey Arnold!” and learned the harsh realities of the workforce and social awkwardness through “Spongebob Squarepants.”

Nickelodeon is more than just a channel, it’s a way of life. Nickelodeon isn’t just for children, it’s for people who want to learn to feel again, to actually laugh when the world has gone dark.

Shows like Spongebob transcend time and space. There’s even a whole channel (The Splat) dedicated to 90s Nickelodeon shows so you can relive the glory that is “Angry Beavers”, “GUTS” and “Rocko’s Modern Life” all over again.

It’s not filled with those short-lived abominations about two quirky girls or about a dog who is also running a blog. Have the people of Disney even looked at that channel lately? What does any of that have to do with Disney? Disney is about fairy tales and magic, not whatever marketing schemes they have on there now.

A sign of a high quality television show is being able to flash mob out the opening theme song at any given moment. And if you think for one second I can’t get down and sing the Spongebob’s, Catdog’s, Fairly Oddparents’ or Drake & Josh’s theme song right now, then we can’t be friends.

I’ll understand if you grew up watching Disney because you either A: hate yourself or B: Your parents hate you. Chemical imbalances in the brain are a thing and completely unavoidable, but don’t let your children succumb to the same fate.

Disney may take the life force of young children and crush them until they’re empty husks of human beings, but Nickelodeon gives you a reason to live again through zany, spongy characters.

— Brian Sheridan, Op/Ed Editor

Disney

You know when you were a little kid and you felt like you were a part of the make-believe world of fairy tales, magical kingdoms and Prince Charming who would come and rescue his bride from her lonely solitude on top of a hill?

Well try to imagine all of that magic being stripped away from you and having the zaniest, most cartoonish programming known to man, Nickelodeon, taking its place as your childhood go-to source for escaping into your day to day fantasies. There goes my childhood because I can’t imagine it either.

Nickelodeon could never reach the global success Disney has with a theme park where both the parents and the children can have fun at the same time.

With Disney, the sky’s the limit and dreams truly do come true, whereas Nickelodeon is one bad, annoying and repetitive sitcom after the other.

There is no competition. Or at least there shouldn’t be.

Celebrity wise, Disney wins hands down. The network has given us people like Miley Cyrus, Selena Gomez and Zac Efron. I am thankful and indebted to them always because without them, the music and film industry would severely be lacking in talent.

If Nickelodeon can’t even top the sheer and utter greatness of star quality that has come out of Disney since the 90s until now, what makes you think they will win in the actual television shows department?

Disney birthed “Lizzie McGuire,” the first show I ever watched, and then followed suit with the awesomeness that was “Kim Possible”, “Hannah Montana”, “Wizards of Waverly Place” and the “High School Musical” trilogy. The list can go on and on and on about all of the great shows that came out of the industry. Can you say the same for Nickelodeon?

I think not, which is why Disney is, was, and will always be the channel I dedicated to and you should as well because it’s the only channel that shaped our early years into what it was; a little kid’s dream come true.

— Sadie Sedlmayr, Staff Writer