Let’s talk.

Women’s clothing sucks. Allow me to count the ways: our jeans don’t have actual pockets, bras are uncomfortable and expensive, clothing has inconsistent sizing and so much more.

What in the world is with clothing manufacturers sticking on a pocket but not making it a viable pocket — it’s annoying. We are teased with a pair of jeans having a pocket to later find out that it’s not even real. Stop playing with my heart.

Also, what’s with the new trend of having a tear in the butt on jeans? It doesn’t look good, nor could I comfortably wear that walking around campus. I wouldn’t spend my money on jeans that have a rip right underneath the butt.

Now I sound like my grandma when she comments on my ripped jeans.

Don’t even get me started on the length of shorts. It’s either bermuda length or too short, there is no in between. I remember having bermuda shorts when I was younger and they were, dare I say, hideous.

They are so uncomfortable, and I’m sorry, there is too much fabric. At that point I think I’d rather put on a pair of jeans instead. 

Now while I think bermuda shorts have too much fabric, there is also such a thing as too little fabric. Every single girl has a pair of shorts that they don’t dare wear around their family because of how short they are. 

Our butts don’t need to be hanging out, and at that point I’d rather put on spandex or wear my bikini bottoms.

Now let’s dive into why bras suck. For one, they are way too uncomfortable. We need to normalize going braless — let your boobs fly free ladies — or having tank top bras which are actual life savers because they are so comfortable.

Secondly, they are too expensive. I mean it’s literally two pads stuck together with a wire covered in poorly-made fabric. I can’t tell you how many times that stupid wire has poked the side of my boob. I don’t get what qualifies it to be so expensive.

Don’t get me wrong, I love a good “Victoria’s Secret” bra, but come on, at that point I’m just paying for the name instead of the actual quality and bra.

The inconsistency in jean sizing is also frustrating (this is an issue with bras as well). I could be a size two in jeans at American Eagle but at Urban Outfitters I could be a size four, I don’t get it. 

Same goes for shirts, I could be a small at one store but a large at another, like make up your mind. Everything fits differently with every brand and style.

Clothing is such a frustrating thing to order online as well, because you don’t know if it’ll fit — and if you are anything like me, I hate shipping something back. I am impatient and I want my refund right away.

We need to normalize more comfortable bras and jeans with actual pockets. I get jealous of the amount of pockets men’s jeans have; they could fit anything in those pockets. 

I wish I could cancel my subscription to women’s clothing design tactics, because I would cancel my subscription in a heartbeat. 

Geiger can be reached at [email protected].