Minecraft. The geometric survival game that has enthralled the masses for 15 years. Or maybe it was just my middle school obsession. Either way, I love this game.
However, Minecraft could be characterized as a pseudo-horror game based on the need for survival and all the creepy crawlers lurking around every tree or cobblestone hole.
As we enter the Halloween season I decided to go through all the things that go bump in the squared universe that is Minecraft. This is a ranking of the Minecraft mobs in order from least scary to most terrifying if you had to encounter it.
I do have a couple of stipulations before I get into my ranking. I couldn’t include all the hostile mobs, so these are my top 15. They are ranked based on how terrifying they would be to run into and the fear factor after years of playing.
Also, some further stipulations include all mob variations are just combined, so no husks or bogged. I also didn’t include the Wither or the Ender Dragon as those are mobs you seek out or summon of your own volition. Now, onto the list.
The pinnacle of a Minecraft mob, this creature will pop up in any dark place and give someone a fright. However, they walk at a very slow pace and only can punch you, so they are at the top of this list. An iconic mob for my middle school backpack, but I’m not scared.
My arachnophobic queens will agree on this one: spiders can be spooky. They outrank zombies based on how fast they can move, the fact they climb walls and how they pounce at you. A perfect creature to squash in the night, but they do lose points for being chill in the day.
A specter of the skies to haunt my nightmares, this mob’s whole thing is to hunt you down if you haven’t slept in a while. Diving down from the night sky would be a terrifying sight if it wasn’t silly in its hunt for you. The amount of times I’ve seen these undead birds crash into a tree takes away the fear.
This spooky boss witch is terrifying as you never know what she’s going to cook up. When she throws potions at you, you don’t know if you’ll go hungry, get damaged or start levitating (they don’t make you levitate). The mystery is what makes her spooky.
The mob of the season, the spooky scary skeleton. This bone-chilling creature is terrifying as they can get you from a distance. Whoever at Mojang, the organization behind Minecraft, decided walking bones could shoot a bow and arrow wanted to make leaving your house so much scarier.
The literal face of Minecraft, this mob is known for its explosive personality. The real fear surrounding this creature is the damage it can cause. Wrecking its surroundings, a Creeper’s blast will hurt everything you love. Emotional terror.
Our first escapade into the Nether, the ghast is a giant flying white octopus monster that shoots fireballs. The sheer size would make you cower, but its screech across hell will send you running. Great balls of fire, I’m scared for my life.
Under the sea is not as nice as Ariel and SpongeBob make it seem. The guardian is a one-eyed fish that shoots laser beams at you and its elder guardian form makes players unable to break out of its sea temple home. The fear of this mob plus the fear of drowning is a no-go for me.
Back into the fiery depths of the Nether, the blaze is a flying fireball machine, whipping an arsenal of fire at you from the sky. What sets this mob apart from the ghast is how much and how quickly they shoot their fire. Ghast are one fireball to the blaze’s three. Math doesn’t lie.
- Zombified Piglin and Friends
I’ll never understand where these mobs came from other than children’s nightmares, but a species of underworld dwelling humanoid pigs are wild. Armies of them are ready to fight if you hit them or aren’t wearing gold for the hoglins. Sorry my silver girlies.
Now this mob is actually based on a horror creature. This Slender Man looking thing from the void will teleport in and out of vision. Never knowing where it is will haunt your dreams just like its blood curdling hiss. Umm … it’s right behind me isn’t it?
Now this is a beast, literally. Attacking villages during a raid, this behemoth’s charge will make you run screaming. How frightening it is amidst a full-on coup to see a towering monster trying to impale you. I’d hate to turn a corner and see this beast looking into my eyes.
This wild hurricane makes the blaze look like Pop-Its fireworks. The breeze is a new mob in the trial chambers, bouncing around the chamber and blasting you with damaging winds. You can’t keep your eyes on this thing, creeping around corners in a room deep underground.
- The Haunted Mansion Trio
The Vindicator, Evoker and Vex are all mobs in the woodland mansion, a literal haunted mansion in a dark forest. These mobs practically haunt the structure, using abilities to float through the walls, summon mouths out of the floor or attack you wildly with an ax.
What could be terrifying enough to pass all of these previous creatures? Something that stalks you in deep dark caves and destroys your life upon hearing you. The Warden is one of the heaviest hitting mobs and scariest to perceive with its large horns, lack of eyes, open maw and enormous stature. This is terror incarnate.
This might have been a silly article, mostly because it is a children’s video game, but that’s mostly so I can get some sleep tonight as I write this in my dark room. I hope you enjoyed my fun descriptions, maybe offering options for your Halloween costume this year.
If you have never played, I would highly recommend playing. According to a new live show by Minecraft, a new update is coming with a creature who could top this list. Allegedly, this creature only moves when you’re not looking, like a weeping angel in Dr. Who. I guess we’ll find out soon.
Fisher can be reached at [email protected].
