With Thanksgiving only a few days away, a large amount of my mental energy has been expended contemplating the impending interactions with my relatives.

I can’t wait to hug my grandparents, hold babies and disappear after an hour for a long walk with my cousins. All of this, of course, in accompaniment with a large amount of delicious food that will annihilate the delicately built microbiome in my gut for days or weeks to come.

When the day progresses past overjoyed greetings and baby-passing, the difficult part comes: actual conversation-making.

One can only compliment someone’s sweater or mention the crummy weather so many times before actual depth is required to continue the chatting.

This is why I’ve compiled a list of the best topics to bring up at dinner to keep the conversation lively.

• Politics

There’s nothing more exhilarating than a heated political debate. The recent election is a hotspot for confabulation. The likelihood that the entire family agrees on polarizing issues is almost zero, which means there’s a nearly 100% chance that this topic will keep the day interesting.

There’s no better time to discuss gun control than while cutting into the turkey. Pumpkin pie is the prime time to discuss the potential book bans listed in Project 2025.

I specifically suggest bringing these issues up with your slightly creepy uncle. Even better if he used to work a government job or has a lot of deer heads mounted on his living room wall.

Some example questions include:

• What are your thoughts on the two party system? 
• Should felons be allowed to vote?
• Will you receive tax breaks during the next presidency?
• How do you feel about GMOs, and are there any in the pie you brought?
• Where were you on Jan. 6, 2021?

Remember not to limit yourself to the facts — make sure to throw in plenty of your own opinions and spice it up with some implausible theoreticals.

• Love life

There is no better time to talk about your love life than with your entire extended family. If you love having your deeply personal choices brought into question, then this is the topic for you.

For example, if you’re not interested in dating someone of the opposite sex, this is a fantastic time to bring it up. There’s nothing like controversy to keep up the banter, and the older generation seems to have plenty of opinions on the matter.

Even better than this is the topic of casual dating. Make sure to compile a list of names and addresses of any and everyone you’re seeing so that your grandma can send a birthday card to each of them.

Maybe even rank the list so she knows how much cash to put in each card.

If you already have a significant other, bring this up so the relatives have ample time to quiz you on every detail of your relationship, including but not limited to: when you want to get engaged, if you’re moving in together or when you plan to have kids.

Living together premaritally is another great conversation catalyst. To really get the family amped up, start this conversation with your religious aunt. If there’s a priest or pastor in the family, they would be even better.

• School

This conversation often begins organically, thankfully. Relatives love to know the path of the younglings in the family. College choices, majors, extracurriculars, internships and graduation dates are all fair game.

If you plan to or are majoring in something out of the norm, this is the best time to bring it up. Mental health is also a great provider of discourse, so if you’re majoring in psychology, mention it. Maybe even slide in a subtle diagnosis of someone in your family.

If you’ve chosen the pre-law tract, mention it. This is a great time for your family to laugh about how your argumentative nature as a child will go to great use.

Bonus: Family secrets

If you know something other people don’t, this is a great time to bring the information to the surface.

Did someone drop out of school? Get plastic surgery? Go through a major breakup?

It’s your responsibility to make sure your entire family knows and can properly scrutinize the subject of interest.

As much as Thanksgiving is a time for spreading love and sharing a delicious meal, love and food don’t keep the conversation interesting. Make sure to take this responsibility upon yourself and make this Thanksgiving one to remember.

Price can be reached at [email protected].